Lovingly yours

The week before last was a very rough one. A cancer threat, screaming fights with AT&T, disgruntlement with Comcast, and a very sick dog ($ 417.00 worth) were among the things that I used to excuse myself for childish behavior. I've tried to tell myself I have a totally compromised nervous system and can't help it. Calmly, cheerfully, my very dear friend and computer guru reminded me that the Lord is "chipping away." God is using negative experiences to teach me to have faith in Him. From the bottom of my heart, thank you, John.

I begin my day studying God's Word and praying. How frequently I pray to be more Christ-like, to be a real example to both those who do and do not know Christ personally. Then, something happens that catches me by nasty surprise. It can range from annoying to catastrophic. And, my behavior ranges from frustration to outrage. Not very Christ-like. Embarrassingly unChrist-like. Such behavior is a total lack of faith. If I truly believe in a Sovereign God Who is good and loving, He has a purpose and a plan for what comes into my life-good, bad, or otherwise. It's been said what He brings into our lives is to bless or to teach. Gratitude for teaching as well as blessing is what He wants and what I need.

It's often been said to never pray for patience because God will use boot-camp techniques in order to stretch our faith and our endurance. But, if that's what I have been praying for, why am I not grateful that God is hearing and answering my prayer? I long for the faith of a Corrie ten Boom without the concentration camp experience. Ain't happening. It takes one to achieve the other.

When I'm having a stubborn, whiny moment, the Lord is so very good to send me someone who can see through my childishness and call me on it WITHOUT harping, preaching, or offensively offering unsolicited advice. John did that. He gently humbled me without humiliating me or letting me know how superior he is. He spoke truth in love.

The old adage, "I'ts not what you say, but how you say it," has good reason to have been around for so long. It's Biblical, for one thing.

I don't know about you, but it's my experience unsolicited advice is rarely, if ever, correct and NEVER appreciated.  It doesn't take much to see through those who point fingers and try to make me feel inferior. Personally, I have had to learn the very hard lesson that sometimes people have turned away from what I was saying, not because they hated me or even what I was saying. It was my tone and intent. I didn't realize I was coming across as a know-it-all. Sometimes what I was saying could have been helpful if I had been more careful about how, where, why, or when I said it. Self-examination (and prayer) could have shown me what I was saying was self-serving. Publicly praise and privately criticize has become my philosophy.

One of the many reasons I appreciate my friend, John, is that I've seen him in similar predicaments and he truly exhibits Christ-like faith and endurance. He's had ample opportunity to show me how to sulk or pitch temper tantrums, but he never has. Barbara Youdarian says self-pity rots the soul. How right she is. I have so much to learn and I'm grateful God isn't finished with me, yet. I'm grateful He gives me friends who are an example and a gentle adviser.
Thank you, Lord, for John.

Change

I've reached the age where accepting change is getting harder and harder. I'm also learning that a bad attitude is the reason change is even harder. For example, when Walmart put in their scan and go option, I was very unhappy and since I often complain about how technologically challenged I am, I vowed never to use it. Last week, one of the clerks noticed I use cloth bags and she remarked how much easier and faster it would be to use scan and go. So, I sucked it up this morning and decided to try it. Voila! It wasn't nearly as hard as I expected it to be. Of course, I was awkward at first. It took a while to know how to point the gun and then, it took a while to learn how far away to hold it in order for the gun to read the whole bar code. Thankfully, someone showed me how to do produce. Someone else got away with several sweet potatoes because she asked me how to record lose items and I still hadn't been shown.  I also had to be careful about where I left my phone, which held my grocery list. Having it stolen while I was scanning an item would not be good. Finally, I had to learn how to take something off my bill or change it. That has to be done at the register.

Now to learn how to scan items on my phone for Weight Watchers information. That's next. The book we were given, of course, does not list all packaged foods and sometimes a packaged food has  to be used in a recipe.

One of the employees at Walmart and I were talking about how much we hate change. The older we get, the harder it becomes.  Unfortunately, the world is not going to come to a stop just because I don't want to accept change. Neither is it going to hold my hand and sooth my anxious feelings  or tolerate my whining. I either catch on or get left behind. Technology is moving so rapidly, the time is going to come when survival depends on learning to adapt.

Dial phones were an improvement over the ones on the wall where the operator came on and asked what number you needed her to call. My aunt had one of those on the farm. Neither they nor the dial phone exist anymore. In fact, when I was growing up, 911 did not exist. Some change is good. Those old black phones weighed a ton and the cord kept you from doing anything but sitting and holding the phone. With cellphones we can multi-task almost anytime, anywhere.

There was a time when I wasn't quite so intimidated by technology. When we moved to Florida, we got our first cellphone. Had a ball with it. Called everyone we knew every time we crossed a state line. In those days, there were roaming charges and we had a whopper of a bill for months, just paying the roaming charges. Roaming charges no longer exist, another advancement in technology that is an improvement. Reluctantly, I have to admit they're not all bad.

But, the biggest change comes when the attitude changes. A computer expert once told me to make the computer work for me, not the other way around. Now if I just get them to understand that, life would be even better than it is now. I've always said the day I stop learning is the day I die, but I never expected it to be technology. For today, I'm just pleased I took the chance and learned to use something I'm sure is vital in the future, whether I like it or not.